Sunday, April 20, 2008

A short trip to the past

I dont like to dwell on the past, or even enjoy going down that road sometimes.
Though i'd be lying if i claim to never think back and take a short mental break from the present.

It was 4/20 yesterday.
Every year since 2001, its a day that for self reflection and also a long trip to the past. all of the "i wonder..." and "what if i had...." runs thru the mind at top speed.
finally when as the trip comes to an end and the clock forwards back to present time, im left with emotions i havent felt in a while, left with vivid memories, also left with that familiar sense of loneliness, knowing it'll take me a very long while before im able to share those feelings with my close and loved ones.
this year though, mind was so occupied that that trip took a late flight, which also means late arrival back...

I believe that the past makes you who you are. we've heard many times that "the past is the past, i dont care about your past..."
without the past, your present self wouldnt be here.
the past is there for us to reflect on mistakes, to grow and learn from it
the past is there for us to remember who were there for us when we were down in the gutter, to appreciate them more everyday
the past is there for us to understand another better, to expand our ability to read & help another better
Things that we've done in the past, on the other hand, should only be comprehended as stepping stones to your new land, but not to dwell in regret

The move to the US and growing up there during your newly-hit-puberty-years up to young adulthood =P, was definitely something i feel very lucky about.
now many will have the stereotyped conclusion of "oh you lived overseas how lucky and rich and how easy you must have had it"
boy dont we wish?!
when i said lucky, yes i do mean i had the opportunity to explore outside of my home country.
lucky that i had the opportunity to have an American education
lucky that i had the opportunity to live and learn about American "culture"
lucky that, gone were the days of tiny portions on your restaurant plates and in comes the generous heap of food placed on American's restaurant tables
lucky that i learnt what work really is at age 14 and understand that money from parents dont come easy
lucky that i met so many different characters during my years, whom i learn very valuable life lessons from, first hand
lucky that years of hard earned money can pay off finally, when i started travelling within the states, the opportunity to explore more of the "dreamland" (driving 6 hours alone and end up getting pulled over is NO FUN!)
lucky that life there had helped me build determination and courage about making bigger decisions and taking absolute control of my future

Moving back to malaysia, was one of them...bringing the years of US with me

Major decisions are scary, you dont have an exact idea on whats ahead of you, only a path with windows of possibilities for you to peek in or jump thru
though if you're determined to make the best out of any situations you end up in, life is less difficult
Hanhi, a very close sis-friend, and I have a favorite saying "Carpe Diem!"
It means "seize the day!".
Seize your opportunities! you never know when you'll never have another day

Saturday, April 5, 2008


What seemed like a new lesson to try out for fun turned out to be a discovery of the inner "fitness soul"...was how I started Pole. Though majority still loves to badger on the stigma of Pole Dance, its the truly adventurous, gutsy, confidant and receptive to modern growth in society that have the GUTS to step foot in the circle of PoLe and accept it as being more than a bar show in bangkok.

I must say i was immensely impressed with the response of Malaysian women AND men who have visited us. Yes we have guys who have been inquiring as well as training at the moment =) and NOT GAY! hehe. Other major nations have already adapted this sport (China, Taiwan, Japan, Singapore, Hong Kong...) and am proud that Malaysia gets a seat on that list.
Of course you still have the percentage who blatantly refuse to accept the idea of Pole Dance being other than strippers trying to make a buck. We cant change their thinking by talking, its the "showing" that does the work =)

Can Pole change a person? physically, yes! mentally, definitely(well, maybe not a complete change but a great self-discovery and builds great sense of determination)! its what we call Pole-Therapy! I used to have super long tired stressed out days but after only an hour of Pole-sweating, much better and cleared thoughts!that a sense of self achievement does wonders psychologically and its way better than prescribed drugs for super stressed out peeps. its hours of hard work and actually SEEING your result! ur become more positive and more confidant...shall i say its a "Pole-Makeover"? ;)

Pole for the soul, ya'll...